Tinderfellas

Since not many men stood out, (but Vaga always got them to put out!) here is a collection of stories of the men who either didn't meet Vaga or was just a random hookup. And FYI these are in no particular order...Vaga isn't picky when it comes to dick as long as she gets it!

Let's start with one that was nowhere near a hook up, but what's that show that exposes people for being someone else? Oh CATFISH! so I wasn't exactly catfishes but it was pretty damn close. First off with Tinder, you can add your social media links, and this guy that I decided to meet up with messaged me on Instagram, we never matched on Tinder. Anyway, I got a message from this guy, his name was Charlie. Charlie was cool, we talked on the phone and through text. So since I was going to a bar with some friends, I decided to plan a meet up there. That way I was with people I knew and could escape if needed! So he tells me he's in the bar by the entrance, I look up and what I saw was not what I expected. I say this because it was as if his Instagram photos were all glamour shots. For a normal human being I am short, I'm 5'2 1/2! This guy was significantly shorter than me, and looked like a combination of my ex's put together. He left right away because he was actually headed out of town and just stopped by to meet me in person. As much of a bitch as I am, I don't believe in being rude to someone for how they look because they weren't what I expected. He still hits me up here and there but no dates ever took place.

Moving on to a very quick hook up, now this was a lot more scandalous. Me and Jack matched on Tinder and messaged each other for a couple of days. One day we both wanted to fuck, so he left work and drove to my place. Now we couldn't have sex at my place and he had to get back to work, so we went to a spot by my house and got in the back seat. Now I love to fuck with people mentally, I knew exactly what was gonna happen and why we both met, however I looked at him dead serious and said "so we're just gonna talk and hang out right?" The look on his face was priceless, and hilarious. I told him I was just fucking around so for a minute or two I waited for him to make the first move. As in control of a woman I may seem, if you're gonna fuck me, at least act like a man. It was this day I knew what it was like to fuck a bitch. So I moved closer to him and made the first move. Then he kept being a baby about other cars driving by. I told him "where we're at is common for people to fuck so no one cares and no one is going to stop because they are all here to do the same thing!" that got annoying because it happened about 3 times. So then, I get on top and get really into it, and as soon as I busted out the girls, he did too. He was seriously lucky that Vaga got hers, otherwise his mouth would have gone to work. After that we cleaned up and I got dropped off at home. When I came home I looked at my brother and said I finally know what it feels like to fuck a girl, because that's what just happened. FYI my brother knew what I went out to do and just laughed at what I told him.

Last guy that is worth mentioning would be the one that still makes Vaga quiver in fear. His name was Dom. Dom was a 6'2 in shape black guy. Now to the average woman, he was fucking fine as hell. To Vaga, he was death! Well let me explain, so we messaged and met up at coffee bean, and after some conversation, we walked to his place. Now I gotta say, there is nothing hotter than a guy with his own spot. I know everyone's situation is different and I don't judge, but it is a nice surprise. Ok, continuing on he did have a roommate so we went straight to his room. He threw on the tv and we were watching Family Guy. Hey guys a tip of advice, we know you're a hoe if we see a bobby pin on the floor and know for damn sure it didn't just fall out of our hair. I didn't care about it when I saw it, but I just thought it was funny. Now if I was to actually date the guy, oh he would have some explaining to do. Anyway he actually showed me he was a man, made the first move and Vaga went along for the ride. She just didn't know what was getting in between her. As a woman, we all want a big dick, however there is such a thing as too big! Personally I love girth on a guy, it just feels better. Length is great too, as long as its not too long. Remember I'm a short ass girl, so I don't want Jack the Giant! Well Dom was packing way too much. As soon as Vaga felt it, it actually hurt. Too long and too much girth. There was no position that was comfortable, and trust me I tried to find one. So I dealt with the pain, got my nut and got dressed. Then after he says, wanna go again? Vaga was thinking, bitch run for the door, you're little and can out run him like a midget! When I just actually said I had to get going, and he had work, and I wanted to make sure I could still walk after too much dick. For the next couple of weeks he would text and I would just ignore him. He was just too big and there really is no easy way to tell that to a guy. Of everything a girl doesn't want in terms of sex, you never thought it would be that, but yes it's true, there is such a thing as being too big!